Voodoo or Coincidence??

I woke up with a rash this morning.  I never have rashes.  Though my mother might tell you otherwise.  In which case, I don’t remember ever having rashes, except when I fell asleep on the beach as a teenager.  That wasn’t pretty either.  Much more painful actually, but I digress.  In the middle of the night, I thought maybe there were bugs in my bed, as my ankles itched like crazy, I mean, like CRAZY, invading my dreams CRAZY.

When the Tot alarm went off early this morning, I rolled out of bed, and put my clothes on when I realized my forearms were itchy.  Then I noticed they were red and bumpy.  So I took my pants off.  Sure enough – my legs were covered too.   Panic starts to set in…  what the hell?  Last week, I had a toothache which led to a root canal on Monday and now this?  Can I still go to water aerobics?  We don’t even have a regular doctor anymore, as our doctor, who annoyed us greatly by never being available, announced she was leaving her practice, and there is no way in hell, I’m getting stuck with Dr.Smiles-constantly-but-doesn’t-listen-to-a-word-I-say-guy again.  He practically water boarded me.

So…  do I call a doctor I’ve never seen before?  Or do I self-diagnose with the help of Google?  Yep.    Verdict?   It could be viral if there’s a fever.  Nope.  Then it’s probably nothing, unless there are petechiae which there weren’t  (little red or purple dots that don’t go away when you press).   Probably a reaction to some new product I’ve been using.  Well, I wore new clothes to work out yesterday without washing them first and started a new body wash day before that.

I decided to go to water aerobics, but to try to avoid people so I didn’t freak them out.  I was rather nervous I would get kicked out for the possibility of being contagious.  I managed to stay covert, or at least no one freaked.  By the time I showered and got dressed again, the rash was creeping up my neck.  I put on my jacket and zipped it all the way up.  Fortunately, it was not itchy all over, all the time.  Only small sections itched part of the time.

I made it through the day, and then in a time warp where I thought it was Friday, and panicked that maybe I should have called the doctor BEFORE 5pm, I realized I had my endodontist’s cell phone number and that maybe, just maybe, it was all related to my root canal.  And in a round-about way, it was.  Turns out, and maybe you have already guessed by now [congratulations-you-are-WAY-smarter-than-I-am-or-maybe-just-more-afflicted] I have developed an allergy to Penicillin.  Oh joy.  No wonder my rash went global, and I do mean global, after I took MORE Penicillin this morning.  Fortunately my half-heimers stood me in good stead, because I completely forgot to take my mid-day dose, which could potentially have escalated matters to the dreaded ER.

Instead, I can no longer claim I am allergy free.  My record is blemished.  Fiddlesticks.  My body just turned on me.  Interestingly enough, I was listening to NPR the other day about how we all use antibiotics WAY too much, and how it’s leading to dangerous diseases which are resistant to our drugs.  Our food industry administers antibiotics to large numbers of animals who are not sick because it’s more efficient than to isolate the sick animals. MRSA, which is a bacterial infection that is highly resistant to some antibiotics, is on the rise.  And just a day or two after I hear that story, my body tells me – ENOUGH Penicillin already, I’m done with that @$%^#??!!!   Jeepers, the power of persuasion!    Although personally, I suspect the short domestic terrorist that is my leader had something to do with it, because a couple days ago, I found this:

A sure sign that Tot has been at work, but in retrospect, I think she was using that spice rack as a voodoo doll – for me.  It sure feels like someone’s sticking toothpicks in me.  She probably did it right after I said NO to her 946th demand for candy that day.  What really scares me, is what else can she do?    What do you think this one means?

If I start speaking in tongues, someone call the police, and have her arrested!